Posts
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I've been down with the acting bug. It's like an itch I haven't scratched ever since I started my Master's degree because I need to 'concentrate on school'. In the past month alone, I haven't been able to watch a live performance or a film without being filled with burning, murderous envy every time an actor walks on stage/screen. Then, I start to question my hiatus, my goals, my needs, my existence, and the meaning of life, or something less melodramatic. Then, on Monday, I was watching Paris Je T'aime for the 948573th time, and somewhere around the Coen Brothers' acerbic Tuileries segment, whilst Steve Buscemi was getting the shit beaten out of him, it hit me that I could quite easily end this torture (mine, not Steve's).
As much as I would love to focus solely on my education, to hell with that. I'm back in the game.
Have had two screen tests in the past two days, and another tomorrow, and a short feature filmed lined up. I start shooting for that at the end of June!
Am going to start training myself up again. I feel completely out of touch and crusted in rust. Even my voice isn't what it used to be. All those years of vocal training and Mee-May-Mee-Mah-Mee-Moh-Mee-Moo-Mee-Mah-HAAAAA-ing flushed down the toilet. Ah, joy. And yet, I have never felt more ready to do this. If there's anything the past two years have taught me, it's that it's almost impossible to be the best actor you can be unless you've hit rock bottom and tasted some of the worst ordeals life in the first world has to offer. It's easy to be lulled into thinking you have your craft pretty sorted (or as much as it could possibly be at one's age). But then life throws you a tsunami, and at once, all former notions about your ability to act promptly kick the proverbial bucket, as emotions you barely knew existed bubble to the surface. Suddenly, some past performances feel almost shallow, and you start to question how much better you could have pulled it off if you'd only had the same life experiences to shape your understanding of people and the world. It's easy to see why some of the best actors have also had some of the worst lives at some point or another. After going through hell and experiencing some of the biggest highs and lows in my entire existence within the span of two years, I certainly don't expect to be the best actor that ever lived - I feel like I have so many more decades of learning ahead and I would never want it to stop - but I'm hoping that on some level, the ability to harness those experiences in a performance will be a pay off for actually having had to live through them.
As much as I would love to focus solely on my education, to hell with that. I'm back in the game.
Have had two screen tests in the past two days, and another tomorrow, and a short feature filmed lined up. I start shooting for that at the end of June!
Am going to start training myself up again. I feel completely out of touch and crusted in rust. Even my voice isn't what it used to be. All those years of vocal training and Mee-May-Mee-Mah-Mee-Moh-Mee-Moo-Mee-Mah-HAAAAA-ing flushed down the toilet. Ah, joy. And yet, I have never felt more ready to do this. If there's anything the past two years have taught me, it's that it's almost impossible to be the best actor you can be unless you've hit rock bottom and tasted some of the worst ordeals life in the first world has to offer. It's easy to be lulled into thinking you have your craft pretty sorted (or as much as it could possibly be at one's age). But then life throws you a tsunami, and at once, all former notions about your ability to act promptly kick the proverbial bucket, as emotions you barely knew existed bubble to the surface. Suddenly, some past performances feel almost shallow, and you start to question how much better you could have pulled it off if you'd only had the same life experiences to shape your understanding of people and the world. It's easy to see why some of the best actors have also had some of the worst lives at some point or another. After going through hell and experiencing some of the biggest highs and lows in my entire existence within the span of two years, I certainly don't expect to be the best actor that ever lived - I feel like I have so many more decades of learning ahead and I would never want it to stop - but I'm hoping that on some level, the ability to harness those experiences in a performance will be a pay off for actually having had to live through them.
